Saying goodbye to death: a personal account of a near death experience

At the end of April 2005, after suffering bowel blockages and continual pain from adhesions, I went to hospital for a laparoscopy to see just what was wrong. Three days after my operation, I was rushed back to theatre. I had developed septicemia and peritonitis from my bowel being accidentally cut. Four days later, I was operated on again, with most of my small bowel being removed. It was literally falling apart in the hands of the surgeon. The open wound was the size of my abdomen, and a colostomy was also done. I was in dire straits in the Intensive Care Unit (ICU). Kidneys lungs and other major organs had collapsed and I was on life support.

I remember my children family and friends saying their goodbyes, but I couldn’t communicate with them. The decision was made to switch off life support as hope for my survival was nil. During this time that I was physically out of it, I was alert spiritually. I could read the minds of my children, friends and nurses. I heard a voice in my ear: “Relax. Let go.” I did just that, relaxed and let go. I felt myself slip out of my body at the back of my head. I went through darkness, grayness, into brilliant light, then found myself in a room full of people in beautiful colours. I felt wrapped in love.

My mother, aunts and friends who had passed on were in the room, as well as my guides and others I had remembered from different times in my life. I wondered what colour I was and looked down at myself, but I wasn’t there, only my mind. Then I saw a beautiful man in a long white robe come into view and I knew he was coming to me.
“Time for you to go back,” he said.
“I don’t want to,” I replied.
“You chose to stay,” he said gently.
“When did I do that?” I started to say, but I was then whisked out of the room. Apparently after life support was switched off, all the equipment had been removed. No one could believe I was actually there, but survive I did. Once I became aware of where I was, my son Graham told me I had been in the ICU for four weeks. I couldn’t believe that was how long I was away.

Next, I was moved to a room in a ward. Just as I thought I was getting better, I was given twenty-four hours to live, as the colostomy had failed, and again the medical staff said there was nothing they could do for me. I remember them taking black bowel away and then discovering new pink flesh! They called me a miracle.

The battle wasn’t over yet. My body was plagued with blood clots and kidney failure. A catheter was inserted in my chest to feed me Total Parenteral Nutrition (TPN), a complete food for my body. I spent six months on TPN, received numerous blood transfusions, and was on a twenty-four hour suction machine for the huge opening in my abdomen. Gradually, the kidneys started to work. Three operations later, I left hospital in early December 2005 - very fragile but still alive.

During my stay hospital, I was taken many times to the other side. Here are some of my experiences.

From out in space, I was shown the planet Earth, whom I call Mother Earth, by two beautiful beings. I looked down on Alaska, Canada North America and South America curving around the globe. There were eruptions along the coastlines. I said to the beings, “Look what is happening to Mother Earth!” They told me to look again, and I saw Australia; I was looking down from the top northern end of Australia and saw a huge wedge of land disappear down the centre and water rush in. “Look what is happening to Australia!” I cried. “Australia is not immune, you know, but do not be in fear,” the beings said.

When I woke up, my room would be bathed in a beautiful soft green light. In this green light, I felt so loved and strengthened. I would float around the corridors and watch the staff working.

Another time, I was in a room with a council sitting on a dais. My guide was with me. I talked and pleaded before the council. With hindsight, I know this to be the time when I talked through and made my decision to stay.

I remember being in a huge cylindrical shape, with beings around me and preparing me for some event by sprinkling gold dust substance over me.

I recall being instructed to breathe a certain way as I had to bring a part of me that was separate, back into me.

There were so many experiences that I have written down. I look back and feel wonder at this incredible journey. How could I ever forget those experiences and the people who surrounded me - my wonderful children, my beautiful friends, and so many others who gave love and healing all through those months to aid in my recovery.

In April and May 2006, I went back into hospital to have TPN and other operation, in an attempt to heal two holes in my abdomen. I turned 69 in the April, and celebrated my first anniversary in the May of surviving after having life support switched off.

In August 2006, I was back in hospital to have all wounds finally sewn up. For the last fifteen months, I had been wearing a massive bag on my abdomen, so getting rid of this was a momentous occasion. I asked Spirit for help; I was surrounded by love of family and friends; I came through with flying colours. My body is whole again - except for my belly button. I don’t have a belly button! I won’t wear a bikini, as the body looks as if it’s been attacked by a great white shark. But what the heck - I’ve turned 70 now, and who would want to see me in a bikini anyway!

I have something more important than no belly button and no bikini look.

I have inner peace and acceptance as a result of what happened to me.
I take full responsibility for the experience, knowing I created it in my life.
Every day I thank Spirit, my family and my friends.
I thank my beautiful unseen friends for their continued love and help in my life, for showing me the miracles they work when asked, and how we receive so much when we truly believe with an open heart.

Friends and staff often ask me: “Why aren’t you angry with what happened to you?” They are referring to the bowel accidentally being cut, which appeared to trigger this incredible journey.

I can only say to them, “The operation was not done with the intention of cutting my bowel. The doctors tried to help. Anger will only make me sick. I am going to win and get better.” And that’s exactly what I have done. I have won, and I am better.

I feel wonderful. I look back on my amazing journey, and all I can say is, “Thank you, thank you, dear Spirit, for this opportunity to live the reason why I’m here, and learn the lesson from it.” I know this experience was part of my contract before I came down, and I chose to stay for the rest of my life to fulfill my contract; however it unfolds, twists and turns.

Perhaps part of my contract this life is sharing this story with you. Perhaps my message to you is: “Death is an amazingly beautiful experience. Do not fear it, dear Ones. There is no death, only a change of vibration. Our physical parting is only temporary, and we do meet and hug our loved ones who have gone before us once again. Believe me - I HAVE DONE IT!”

Every day is now filled with love, anticipation and excitement for what I am creating. For the support of my spirit friends, and to you for reading my story, I say, Thank you.